October 12, 2006
Clancy’s Essay and My Song
Please forgive me, I know I promised that I would resume the series I’ve been writing on the different churches I’ve attended through the years and the influence each one has had on my life in distinctly God-ordained ways. Thanks in advance for understanding but I just couldn’t find the time to write one more thing this week. So for starters, I thought I’d share a little worship song I wrote, once upon a time. (Sorry, I had to dig through the archives of my computer files for something to post this week.)
Lord, please rescue me
Or I will surely drown.
In over my head
I'm afraid I'm going down.
Clinging to Your hand
While the storm is all around.
As You walk on water
Lead me to higher ground.
Chorus:
I lift my hands
To reach for You
Hold tight the scarlet rope.
I lift my hands
And trust in You
My Savior and my Hope.
In this battle for my soul
I'm a prisoner of war.
Doing things I promised
I would never do before.
Finally, I cry Your name,
"Deliver me once more.
All that I have lost
Only You could now restore."
Repeat Chorus
Filling broken cisterns.
Lighting my own fire.
Making all my plans.
Forgetting to inquire,
Of You, most holy Lord,
To Whom I now retire
My might and my power.
Your Spirit, I desire.
Repeat Chorus
Thankfully, my sweet daughters also offered to help me out this week. The other day, the girls asked me why I was so stressed lately. (I probably just snapped at them for some tiny little infraction.) I explained that I had made the mistake of over committing myself and now I was paying the price. Haven asked, "Can we help?" I jokingly replied, "Yes. You can write something for me." Clancy piped up, "Well, actually, Mom, I did write a little something a few nights ago when I couldn’t get to sleep. You can use it for one of your journal entries, if that would help." When she sent me the following file, I was completely at a loss for words. (And, as you can imagine, that almost never happens.)
Why? One of the most commonly asked questions of human existence. "Why didn’t you call me?!" "Why did she break up with him??" "Why didn’t you eat your vegetables?" There are many different people we direct this question to but there’s one Person that almost everyone has asked….God. "Why me, God?" "Why her, God?" "Why not, God?"
The front page news after 9/11 screamed, "Why did God let this happen?" "If God really loves us then why did he let thousands of people die?" No one ever truly knows God’s motives but we do know this. God always has our best in mind. Now, that doesn’t mean we can’t screw it up, because man, can I mess things up. But it does mean that God isn’t letting all of this happen as some cruel joke.
Believe me, I’ve been through some pretty hard times. I remember one time in particular. I was sitting on my bed crying, and my mom said, "Do you know what the key to life is?" I said "What?" "Trust." she said, "Trust that God allowed these things to happen for a reason, trust that as long as you obey Him it will get better, trust that He’s going to get you through. All you have to do is give it up to him."
I took her advice and it actually helped. (I know crazy right?) I simply said, "Okay, God, I give this up to You. You are in control. Please just give me the strength to get through." And I mean it wasn’t like some miraculous thing where everything got better immediately but I did feel a little more peaceful, and that peace just kept on growing and growing.
The best part was that I learned something from it and, believe it or not, I was actually glad that it had happened. I mean, I learned more about God and his loving comfort and strength in that one situation than I probably would have learned in a year if it hadn’t happened. Now whenever something comes up that would have been humongous or seems unconquerable. I say, "I can do this. I have God on my side cheering me on and giving me strength."
So, whenever you find yourself in a hard situation, instead of asking "Why? Why did you let this happen God?!" Stop, and ask, "What? What do you want to teach me, God?" "Who? Who do you want me to reach, God?" "Where? Where do you want me to go, God?" That usually leads me back to "Why," but this time I come at it from a different perspective. Why? Why would someone as big as God want to use me as his instrument? And then I have to say…. "Wow!"
Posted by weblion at 03:16 PM
